Be grateful!

* When you're unable to feel gratitude * Struggling with the present moment * Why is gratitude worth feeling? * Opening up to Life *

In our everyday lives, any other emotion is more likely to overcome us than gratitude. We may think we have nothing to be grateful for: this moment is not quite what it should be. And this leads to an unresolvable tension: the ideal state is somewhere in the future, and the future is not now, in this moment. "Give it to me, Lord, but give it to me now" - we want to get there as soon as possible, and this leads to longing, and in its absence, boredom. When we yearn, we draw energy away from the now to give it to future fulfillment, and when we are bored, we withhold our life energies from unfolding in the present - we wait in the hall of life, dozing in our dreams. A sense of gratitude only sometimes floods over us: for example, when we see a severely physically handicapped person, or a homeless beggar. We think, "It's a good thing I'm not in that situation" - and sometimes we mistakenly believe this for compassion.

When we are unable to feel gratitude, we declare war on the present moment. Ultimately, we are at war with wholeness, with Life, which is never other than now, in this moment. Life does not take place in the past, nor in the future, it is always in the one eternally present now. For our memories are remembered now, our plans or fears for the future are woven now. The past, when it happened, was also now, the future only becomes reality when it is happening now. And if you understand this, you understand the point: there is no reality other than the eternity of now. And when you close yourself off from accepting the present moment, you are actually closing yourself off from life, from being present in life. You deprive yourself of exploring all the possibilities that unfold in the now and shape your imagined future. You become dissatisfied, bored, withdrawn from the fullness of life. "Sorry, but that's not the reality I want. I don't want this moment. I won't accept it, I won't participate in it, I'd rather sit here in the hell of my desires and fears!". Most of our suffering comes precisely from a rejection of the fullness of the present.
The feeling of gratitude is for these inner sufferings, for the release of the waiting, dormant states between life and death. 

If you think deeply about it, you definitely have something to be grateful for. If you are healthy, it is easy to see that you can be grateful that you are not in the situation of millions of disabled or sick fellow human beings. If you are not terminally ill, you can think of the suffering that dying cancer patients go through in their last hours. You can be grateful that you can read these lines at home or at work with your high-tech gadget: most of humanity has not had the knowledge of reading, a secure job or a roof over their heads. If you contemplate this for a long time, you will realise that ultimately you should be grateful for existence, because your existence is a miracle. The creation of life is a true miracle. Out of millions of sperm cells, it was only one that fertilised the mature egg cell that gave birth to your physical form. If we take everything into account (the probability of the creation of the Universe, the creation and evolution of life on earth, the probability of the creation of humanity and of you), it becomes obvious that according to the probability calculus of mathematics, you should not actually exist. To paraphrase the astronomer and mathematical scientist Fred Hoyle, the probability that you exist is far less than the probability that a turbulence of air rushing through a scrap iron plant will create a working airplane from rusty iron ready to take off.

Try it: if you can, retreat to a quiet place full of natural beauty. Watch the clouds float gently in the sky, take in the birdsong, enjoy the rich colours, embrace the tranquillity. Then take a few deep sighs, and as you sigh release any remaining tension. Know that it is good to be.

Then slowly take a very deep breath. And as you slowly take in the air, let your eyes wander softly over the beauty of nature. And you look inward, into yourself, and feel gratitude. Feel how wonderful it is that you exist. How wonderful that everything is as it is. You might as well say thank you to the All (Universe, God, Godhead, whatever you want to call it). List as many things as you can be grateful for: that you are alive, have somewhere to rest your head, have enough money to live in the culture we invented - be grateful for everything.

When you experience the feeling of gratitude intensely, something special happens. Deep down, there is a peaceful calm, you are not resisting anything. You open up and let yourself be absorbed in the fullness of the moment, in the world that exists. You feel an inexpressible bliss: the joy of being. Breathe deeply and slowly; and let the world come into you. Breathe in the being, joyfully acknowledge the inner peace and harmony - know that you are connected to the universe. 

As you do the practice of thanksgiving more and more, you will be surprised to find that Life does wonders for you and for you. You are willingly and joyfully present in the now moment, floating with life in a kind of soft, light and joyful flow. You notice happenings, things you hadn't noticed before, which deepen your sense of wonder and gratitude. You notice the possibilities hidden in moments that make your life better, more harmonious. Whatever you do, you do it with joy, gratitude - and surprisingly, with more results than before. Life is at your side as a friend, at your service. 
Take a deep breath, inhale and acknowledge, "Oh, thank you! Thank you so much for everything!"

Excerpt from the book "The Mysteries of Consciousness” by Ervin Kery